Buy a Title of Nobility – Best Your Best Friend

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Do you have that one best friend who’s always trying to out-do you? You make a big new purchase one day—a car, a smart phone—and show it off to everyone you know, and the next he’s parading around a model that he claims is “just a tad” better than yours. You take your girlfriends out for a double date, and he insists on paying for the whole dinner. You bring up the news of your promotion at work, and he asks you what the raise was like, just to compare with his last bump up the pay scale.


This kind of one-upmanship can get old. But you can’t just let him win. So it’s time to put the competition to rest for good. Here’s how: Become nobility. That’s right, your friend can try all he wants to out-buy, out-earn, and out-class you, but there’s no way he can really out-do you if your name is Lord John Smith of Pomerania and Livonia. For just a small fee, gives you the opportunity to become a Lord, Count, Duke, Baron, or even Prince. We also have Lady versions for all of these, and even two-title packages for couples.

The Feat That Can’t Be Beat


When you buy a royal title with us, you gain the ability to officially change your name so that all your papers—your bank accounts, credit cards, chequebooks, ID cards, and passport—include proof of your nobility. So on the next double date your friend will be reaching for his wallet and insisting, “No, I got this,” just as the waiter is returning with the receipt because you’ve pre-arranged to pay. “Thank you so much, Lord Smith,” he’ll say. And all the eyebrows at the table will go skyward. Your girlfriend will proudly nuzzle into your arm, your friend’s girlfriend will look on with wide-eyed admiration, and your friend will seethe with envy.

Of course he won’t believe you until you show him the proof. Which is why we’ll also send you a hand-signed letters patent with the impressive gold seal of the kingdom as well as a sealed certificate of authenticity. These will go nicely in frames in your living room, so when your friend insists that he thinks you’re up to some sort of scam, you just invite him over for a drink and let him despair. You’ll also get a grand and imperial blue and gold medal that will be sure to shut him up if he starts to protest further. Just hang it around your neck and let him gape.

Getting the Better Once and For All


Maybe this seems to you like a temporary win. Maybe you think he’ll figure out a way to get the better of you after all. But he won’t. Because buying a royal title is a victory that lasts. Not only do you officially change your own name, but it also becomes a part of your legacy. When you buy a two-title package, you and your girlfriend become a royal couple. And if you end up starting a family, the whole clan is royal. Because our titles can be passed on from generation to generation. That means your children will be royal after you, as will their children, and their children’s children, and so on. So how can your friend possibly compete if you’re not just becoming a VIP yourself but creating a whole dynasty, of VIPs? He’ll have nothing to do but concede at last that you’re the better man.

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